Holding Paradox in Unschooling, Homeschooling, and Intentional Living

I posted this in my social media today:

"Multiple truths can exist simultaneously, Today is rainy, windy, and maybe we hear thunder? We LOVE days like this, AND we wish it was a sunny beach day AND we wish it was snowy. On our porch is a Halloween pumpkin beside Christmas lights. We are building an excellent education on a foundation of consent."

The caption continued: 

“We live in an unending state of harmonious paradox. The trick is changing our mindset away from our socially conditioned either/or to a far more open and accepting both/and.

We can homeschool and never touch curricula.

We can unschool and use schools.

We can parent respectfully and have screen time limits and household chore duties.

We can build an excellent education on consent.

Interest / wonder led learning and math are not mutually exclusive.

Reading fluency can grow from video games, TTRPG’s, and board games.

Both/and not either/or.

All or something not all or nothing.

Loving what is while desiring change and growth.

What paradoxes are you discovering in your homeschooling, unschooling, and intentional parenting journeys? Are you able to sit with them and be open to the possibility that both sides can be true?”

It resonated so well in my heart that I had to share it here too, so it wasn't lost in the sea of content creation. It felt so important that I actually postponed the theme I had planned for my December blog and newsletter, which are nearly copy and pasted this month. I'll get to invisibility another time. 

Holding seemingly opposite ends of a spectrum, and accepting both as absolutely true is a form of magick that allows you to see and accept the world on a different level than the folks who can only believe one thing at a time. While holding paradox is a trait I was born to carry, it is also a skill / mindset that can be learned. 

Thinking about it today, this piece of mindset is actually rather foundational to many of my beliefs, and is also core to my practice as a mentor. This ability is the reason so very many people come to me with issues they are terrified to share with anyone else, and why they continue to come back to talk to me. I can be in full approval of where they are RIGHT NOW and simultaneously help them grow into who they would rather be or guide them to a more useful mindset. 

Most apparent spectrums are actually circles or cycles, winter is not anti-summer, orange is neither halfway to red nor halfway to yellow but occupies the liminal space of both/and, mothering and fathering can be very different and a completely harmonious dynamic duo.

Unschooling is not anti-education. Homeschooling need not be anti-school. Consent need not impair education. 

Here's a few more:

Your child can be really obstinate and interested at the same time.

Your child can need space and your comfort at the same time.

We can hold fury and love simultaneously. 

We can shelter our children and help them stretch their wings.

We can fear and hope concurrently.

We can be terrified and courageous at the same time. 

If having a conversation with an excellent paradox holder would be useful in your parenting and education journey, I have a few spots open for Uncharted Conversations, my asynchronous mentoring container. You can check that out here: Mentorship

Also: BIG REMINDER!

The enrollment for the beta run of Deschooling With Direction: Essential Skills for Intentional Adventures in Life and Education for Unschoolers, Homeschoolers, and Intentional Families closes on SUNDAY. There are still places available, so if you want to join us, NOW is the time to message me! The course outline can be seen here: https://unchartedauthenticity.mvsite.app/deschooling-with-direction when you message me I can give you all the details about the beta run. Or you can wait til spring and pay for it😉